Preparing kids for back-to-school season often means back-to-school shopping, crisp "new school year" haircuts and a return to a school-time routine.
For many parents, it also means learning some essential mental health tips to help manage any back-to-school stress and anxiety kids may experience.
Dr. Howard Y. Liu, M.D., an adult, child and adolescent psychiatrist and chair of psychiatry at the University of Nebraska Medical Center, is also a father of four school-aged children.
Liu, who also serves as chair of the American Psychiatric Association’s Council on Communications, says there are five easy mental health tips for back-to-school that he encourages all parents to learn and that he even uses himself.
"One model that I learned when I was in fellowship that I think really applies to parenting is: 'Never worry alone," Liu tells TODAY.com. "I think that's a great mantra for parents and for the entire household. Remember, not all kids — and especially not all teens — are going to go to their parents, but they're worried."
According to a Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) study that examined mental health symptoms in four different U.S. school districts during 2014–2018, a reported 1 in 6 students had enough behavioral or emotional symptoms and impairment to be diagnosed with a childhood mental disorder.
A separate study released in February, 2023 found that teen girls are experiencing an increase in sadness, violence and suicidal ideation — a reported 75% of teen girls living in the U.S. felt persistently sad or hopeless in 2021.
"Just make sure that (your child knows) that they don't need to worry alone, that you're there for them," Liu says. "That is one key piece."
Back-To-School Mental Health Tips
Spend quality time together on a regular basis
Liu says spending one-on-one time with your child before or after school is a great way to foster essential conversations about their mental and emotional wellbeing.
"I am usually the morning person in my household, so I drop my kids off in the morning," the dad of four says. "I find that those five or 10 minutes during the commute is a good time just to check in with them."
One 2023 study published in the journal Frontiers in Psychology found that "parental accompaniment is an important determinant of children’s wellbeing."
Talk about bullying
According to the CDC, a reported one in five high school students report being bullied at school and more than one in six say they're bullied electronically.
"The interesting thing I have found as a child psychiatrist is that many kids don't talk about bullying unless you directly ask them: 'Have you experienced any bullying?'" Liu says. "So you do have to talk to them about it."
Liu suggests taking a proactive approach to discussing school verbal, physical and online bullying, as well as how to be a helpful bystander when they witness bullying taking place.
"Having those conversations proactively about some of the things they might see, what you want them to do, and teaching them to be an ally for kids that are struggling a little bit is good," Liu adds.
Get back into a reliable routine early
Liu says that while it's very tempting to let kids stay up late and sleep in during the summer, it's vital to start getting them on a solid routine — particularly a sleep routine — prior to the start of school.
"Trying to get back in the routine usually can't happen overnight," he says. "So at least three weeks before school starts, try to get back into that sleep routine."
According to a 2022 study published in the journal The Lancet, children who got an insufficient amount of sleep experienced more mental health and behavior challenges than their peers who received enough sleep. Less sleep was also found to be linked to "stress, depression, anxiety and aggressive behavior."
Have family meal time every day
Family therapist Anne Fishel, executive director of the non-profit organization the Family Dinner Project, told the Harvard Graduate School of Education that only 30% of U.S. families regularly eat dinner together, despite studies showing that regular family meals are associated with lower rates of depression, and anxiety.
"A lot of good research shows that family mealtime together is really an anchor," Liu says. "It doesn't matter what meal — it can be breakfast, lunch, a snack or dessert — doesn't matter, but that time is actually really protective."
Quality exercise
"Excercise is super important," Liu says. "We know that, for example, some kids live in neighborhoods where it's not safe for them to go play outside, or go for a walk or run or ride their bike. Sometimes school can be that place where they can safely workout and exercise."
Liu says exercise is a "really important" tool for managing anxiety and depression, especially if it's "mild to moderate."
More Information
How Does School Affect Mental Health?
Not enough sleep
According to Sleep Foundation, which provides evidence-based medically-reviewed sleep health information, studies have shown that early school start times lead to students getting less sleep.
A reported 60% of middle schooler students do not get enough sleep on school nights — for high schoolers, over 70% receive an inadequate amount of sleep.
"Sleep is something to pay attention to because it's enormously important," Liu says. "There's more and and more data that shows that throughout our lifespan, sleep is hugely important for brain health."
Too many extracurricular activities
"One trend — and it's hard for parents — is the over-scheduling," Liu says. "I think sometimes it's such a tornado of activities that it engulfs everything else. And if you spend the whole weekend driving back and forth to different meets and competitions and lessons and so forth, there really isn't a sense of stillness."
According to the Cleveland Clinic, experiencing stillness can help promote mindfulness, which leads to a number of mental and physical benefits, including increase focus and cognition.
Feeling isolated and alone
Liu says that since the onset of the global COVID-19 pandemic, students have had a more difficult time feeling connected to their peers.
"I see a lot of people in my clinic who struggle because they really don't have close friends and acquaintances," he says. "There are people they see at school, but I always ask: 'Do you see friends outside of school?'"
"That peer group piece is super important," Liu adds.
Signs Of Mental Health Distress To Look For
Liu says there are a few signs of mental health distress in a child that parents can look for, especially if they know that back-to-school season is specifically anxiety-inducing for their child.
"If your kid is having trouble sleeping — my rule of thumb is usually if it takes them longer than half an hour to fall asleep or they're waking up more than a couple times a night and have difficulty falling back asleep — that's something to think about," Liu says.
Because anxiety, stress and depression symptoms are often physical — especially in young children who do not have the vocabulary to voice their thoughts and internal feelings — here are some other physical signs to look for, according to Liu:
- Stomach aches
- Headaches
- Nausea/vomiting
- Diarrhea
Most importantly, Liu says to be kind to yourself as you help your child navigate a new school year.
"'Good enough' parenting is just fine," he says. "Kids will be, at large, OK. You have to give yourself permission to know that it's not always going to work out perfectly — you won't be at every practice, every concert — and that's OK. What's important is that you have that family nucleus."